Living a Lion: BBW Paranormal Shape Shifter Romance (Sleeping Lions - Shifters Prime Book 1) Read online

  The second shock of the evening hit Kane. On his wrist he wore his father’s bracelet. Darius had given it to him when he was five. His uncle had told him how precious it had been to the father Kane had never known, and Kane had vowed to never take it off.

  It had always been there, a thing, a part of him that he never noticed, in the same way his body took in air, constant, but unobserved. Now as the moonlight caught it, it shimmered cold and dull, just like the collar the woman, he couldn’t recall her name, wore around her neck.

  He itched to take it off. But if he did, and he was one of them, his life as he knew it would be over.

  Kane closed his eyes and drew on his inner strength. This couldn’t be rushed into; he had to be careful and calculated in his actions. He had to behave exactly as his uncle had taught him.

  Damn it! None of it made sense. His uncle was training Kane to take full control of his growing empire and Darius would never, knowingly, pass it on to a shifter. The business world would never accept him, and the law made it impossible. Shifters were not allowed to own property, let alone a successful corporation, in this part of the world. They had their own country across the border in Shifters Prime.

  Kane sank to the floor, sitting on his haunches while he formulated a plan.

  What plan?

  He either stayed here, living a lie. Or he jacked everything in and went across the border to Shifters Prime and a life as … a what? What exactly did this bracelet prevent him from becoming?

  Standing, he walked quickly to the house. He had to corner her. The woman who had been here under the full moon might be able to help him. Or might very well be on the phone now to the press. This story would pay off her debt and set her and her family up for life. It was just what the paparazzi were looking for.

  His walk became a run. Although as soon as he reached the drive, which was floodlit, he slowed to a walk to avoid drawing attention to himself. Because now, in Kane’s eyes, he was vulnerable— the slightest mistake and he would be outed.

  Touching the bracelet, feeling its cold hard surface, he wondered if he was overreacting. Maybe it was just a trinket his father had picked up on his travels. It might be completely innocent, of nothing but sentimental value, and if he took it off, Kane would be completely the same. Completely normal.

  Yet as he walked into the house, the moon reflected on the glass pane in the door and he knew that wasn’t true. He had felt the change in himself, the pull to rip his skin off and become something else, something more.

  His uncle must know. Darius was the only person in this world he truly trusted, and he should be the person Kane spoke to first. Would that take away his choice? If Darius had been shielding Kane’s true identity, once he knew the secret was out, would he have to force Kane to leave?

  What was he supposed to do?

  All his life he had known what was expected of him, how he was supposed to behave. Darius had brought him up to be strong, and truthful, in all he did. Taught him to listen to others, and how to treat those under him with respect. Was he supposed to throw that all away? For the unknown.

  He took a deep breath, straightening his clothes, smoothing his hair. Head held high, he assumed his normal persona, blocking out the pull of the moon, becoming his usual self. Becoming normal.

  Why would he want to be anything else?

  Chapter Four – Amara

  Shaken, she went to the kitchen, quickly returning to her chores. If you worked hard, then no one noticed you, and she wanted to be unnoticed.

  Well, she had royally screwed that one up. She had brought herself to the attention of Kane Reinier, and no doubt her behaviour would be enough for her to be moved on. Her contract sold to someone else, and her life would be miserable.

  Amara had been lucky to be brought here by Darius. She had no skills, no training to be a housemaid, and yet he had insisted. Now he would regret his actions and she would end up in one of the sweatshops in another part of the world. Her only skill, as a seamstress, would ensure that.

  “Stupid. Stupid,” she breathed to herself as she took down a serving tray and began to gather up all the cutlery ready to lay the small table in the breakfast room. It was where Darius and Kane ate when it was just two of them for dinner. She wanted to get it done quickly so that she didn’t have to face him.

  Then she would ask Misty to take over serving the dinner. Amara would cry off with a headache. Understandable since the moon was so full, so bright in the sky. Concentrate.

  “Amara. Can you take this up to Mr. Reinier’s office?” the cook, Mrs. Bower, asked.

  “Of course,” Amara said, going to pick the tray of drinks up. Darius liked a drink before dinner; he was old fashioned and formal about these things, so different to the younger Mr. Reinier, Kane. At the thought of him, her hands trembled and the glass clinked against the decanter.

  “Don’t drop it,” Mrs. Bower said sharply. “If you do, you will most likely add another year onto your contract.”

  “It’s not worth that much, is it?” Misty asked, coming in and looking critically at Amara. “Are you OK, honey? You look all done in.”

  “I’m feeling a bit odd,” Amara said, knowing she couldn’t possibly face Kane and Darius tonight.

  “I bet,” Misty said, coming over to her and looking at her more closely. “It will get easier. Why don’t you go and have a lie down?”

  “What about Mrs. Bower? I supposed to take this up to Darius,” Amara said.

  “She’ll understand; this is your first moon. Not being able to change makes you feel as if you are in a straitjacket. I know, I can still remember…”

  Amara put her hand on Misty’s arm and said comfortingly, “You are so close to the end of your contract. One day soon you’ll be free.”

  Misty smiled weakly. “What if I’ve forgotten how to shift? What if I’m stuck like this?”

  “You won’t be,” Amara said, but knew how Misty felt. The thought had haunted her ever since her lioness had been tamed by the awful collar. After three years of denying her lioness, would she still be there, waiting for her?

  “Go. I’ll take care of this. Go and have a hot bath, that always helps.” Misty took the tray, spoke briefly to Mrs Bower, and then went upstairs.

  Amara paused for a moment, not sure what to do. The moon was calling her outside, but she knew to go and sit in the open air, with the light on her skin, would be torture. So she headed upstairs to her room, grabbed her bathrobe, and went to the bathroom she shared with Misty.

  There she ran a hot bath, pouring in copious amounts of bath foam, letting the scent fill the air. Slipping into the water, she let her mind clear. Misty was right, this was the best place for her to be. The window was small, and the moon wasn’t in view. She could lie here and forget about the evening and just hope that, in a month’s time, the next full moon wouldn’t be so difficult.

  However, as those thoughts faded, they were replaced by the face of Kane Reinier, his expression a mixture of fear and dread. She had brought something into his life he had been unprepared for. She knew he would be questioning why she had run, and why her touch had shocked him so much. And any intelligent person, and she knew for sure he wasn’t some dumb rich kid, would put the pieces together and come up with shifter.

  Amara ducked under the water, wanting the water to wash away the sensations she had felt when she touched Kane. It couldn’t be true. She didn’t even know for sure he was a shifter. Yes, you do.

  And even if he was, he had kept it carefully hidden, and why would he want to give up a life here for a new life in Shifters Prime? A new life with her. With his mate.

  No. He wasn’t, it was something else—the electricity must have been just static. There was no way she was his mate. She had to put it out of her mind. With the collar on, the sensations were dimmed; if she didn’t touch him, didn’t go near him, this would go no further. He had no idea who she was, what she was to him. And that was how it would stay, she wouldn’t even tell Misty.
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  Getting out of the bath, she dried her body, ignoring the sense of arousal that infused her blood. She would conquer this, and work the two years of her contract, never going out to look at the moon again, never looking at Kane Reinier, and certainly never letting on he was her mate. That was the promise she made herself as she lifted her duvet and slid underneath.

  Yet when she closed her eyes, the big shining orb of the moon was burning on her eyeballs, and when she opened them again, she was sure Kane was there in the bed beside her. Screwing up her eyes, she blocked them all out. Instead she conjured up her lioness, and dreamt of running along, four giant paws and her beautiful long tail, sandy fur, the wind blowing through it as she made a dash for the river where she would jump in and splash around with her brothers.

  Before she could stop herself, a wave of homesickness swept over her and she was crying, great racking sobs that jarred her body. Biting down on her pillow, she fought for control. She could do this! She had to do this. For her father, for her family. As the only daughter it had been more sensible for Amara to take up the contract, but it hurt like a big rip in her heart that it had come to this, and for the first time she resented her family, and that made her sorrow even worse.

  Five hours later, she was still awake. The clock read 4:00am, everyone else would be in bed. She got up, dressed in a T-shirt and loose pants, and went down to the kitchen. Maybe a cup of tea and watching the sunrise would make her feel better. Sleep was not her friend tonight and she was tired of fighting it, along with the other images in her head of the home she missed, and her lioness.

  A faint headache accompanied her as she went down to the kitchen. The air was chill, the heat from last night’s cooking now gone, although the smell of roast pork still lingered. Amara went to the kettle and filled it with fresh water. Leaning against the counter she waited for it to boil, closing her eyes and rubbing her temples to ease her head.

  “You couldn’t sleep either?” his voice asked.

  Her head flew up, the thumping in her temples intensifying as her heart thundered in her chest. “I … no.” She was confused. If he was her mate, then she should have felt his presence, but her senses were dimmed. One hand strayed absently to stroke her collar.

  Kane came closer, and her body became aware of him, her breasts swelling, her nipples becoming hardened peaks, as though they were trying to reach out to experience his touch. She longed for him to brush his hand over her sensitive skin and take her arousal to a new high. Amara shifted uneasily. She needed to get control of herself.

  “Please,” she said, taking a step back.

  “Don’t be afraid,” he said gently. Too late, she thought.

  “What do you want?” she asked.

  “Answers,” he said bluntly. And he looked so miserable, that she wanted to hold him. This man, so handsome, so strong, was hurt and confused and she desperately wanted to make it right for him. But she had no idea how she could do or say anything, without making him feel worse.

  “I can’t help you,” she said, but she didn’t move away when he reached out and touched his fingers to her collar. Nor did she flinch when his fingers strayed off the cold metal and touched her skin. The electricity still shocked her, but she was ready for it this time. Because she had questions too.

  Each held the answers the other sought. Somehow they were bound together, and as she looked into his confused eyes, copper coloured, flecked with cream, the colour of her lioness’s fur, one of those answers fell into place.

  “It’s the same. Isn’t it?” he asked, holding up his wrist with the bracelet on.

  “I think so,” she said, not wanting to commit to revealing what she thought he was. She still did not know why he wore the bracelet, or how much he knew. This might be a test, and if she failed and revealed what she thought, her contract might not be sold; instead, it might be terminated. She might be terminated.

  The human world was suspicious of shifters. Ever since the war, humans had passed a law that stated every shifter in the human world had to wear a collar to stop them changing into their beast. If anyone was caught without one, it was well within a human’s rights to terminate the creature. It would be easy for the Reiniers to take off her collar and then say they were acting in self-defence. And in doing so, terminate the possible fallout by the paparazzi finding out Kane Reinier was a shifter.

  “Do you know what I am?” he asked.

  “No,” she replied. Keep it simple. Non-committal.

  “But I am the same as you?” he asked.

  Yes. “I don’t know,” she replied.

  “Can’t you tell?” he asked, his breath warm on her face as he leaned in to ask her, his voice no more than a breath.

  Her eyes met his and she saw his uncertainty, tinged with fear. He didn’t know. This wasn’t a trick. He was scared; this news was new, terrifying, because it would change his life forever. It had already changed his life forever. Last night he had learned his life was not what he had thought it was. There was no going back.

  “No.” She shook her head. Self-preservation was still uppermost in her head. But he is our mate. Somehow, and maybe it was the presence of him so close to her, but her lioness managed to speak to her, a voice she hadn’t heard for weeks.

  Turning from him, she wiped her eyes, not wanting him to see her cry. But Kane reached out and touched her, an agony and an ecstasy rolled into one as his fingers touched her skin, making a connection that went deeper than flesh. He reached into her soul and when he suddenly let her go, she knew he had felt it too.

  “What is this?” he asked. “Why do you have this effect on me? I’ve met your kind before, touched them before. But I have never experienced this. Is this a new weapon? Are you using some kind of chemical warfare?”

  She rounded on him, her temper rising, her wounded pride at having this man as her mate conquering her reserve. “My kind? I only wear this collar because humans are scared of what they don’t understand.”

  “I’m sorry,” he said. “This is confusing. It’s … I don’t know what to think. I have lived my whole life here, on this side of the border. Until you touched me, I had no idea I might be … different.”

  “Look. I don’t want trouble. I have a contract; your uncle owns that contract. I can’t help you,” she said, although it was the hardest thing she had ever done. They were meant to be together, they were mated. But the strong feelings weren’t there, and at that moment she was glad. Glad his anguish didn’t rip into her heart and tear it out.

  “Of course. I don’t want to cause trouble for you,” he said, stepping back away from her.

  She moved, keeping her distance as she left the room. But in the doorway, she hesitated. “Don’t you remember living anywhere else?”

  “No. I have always lived here with my uncle,” he replied.

  “Did he give you the bracelet?” she asked.

  “Yes, he said it was my father’s.” Kane lifted his arm and touched the bracelet. “He told me to never take it off.”

  She nodded, knowing with certainty that Kane had been given the bracelet in a bid to keep his identity as a shifter safe. “Then perhaps you have been asking the wrong person. You should speak to your uncle.”

  And then she left, despite the gnawing in the back of her mind, which she presumed was her lioness showing her disgust at them deserting their mate. We need time to think, she told her lioness, but had no idea if she could hear.

  Chapter Five – Kane

  After she left the kitchen, he stood and thought about what she had said. He was sure she knew much more than she was letting on, but couldn’t blame her for not wanting to get involved. Especially when he had accused her of testing a secret shifter weapon on him. Nice touch, he berated himself.

  The sound of one of the other servants moving around woke him from his thoughts. He headed back to his room for a long shower, to try to wash away his doubts and fears. As he washed himself, the bracelet on his wrist became more noticeable, heavier someh
ow. The weight of his decision concentrated on the thin piece of metal he had worn all his life. He lifted it up, letting the water splash over it and could see the thin line of copper that threaded through the silver. It was of the same composition as the collars shifters wore, but the question was: Did he wear it for the same reason? Was he capable of shifting?

  As he got out of the shower and grabbed a towel, his fingers touched it, and for a split second he was tempted to take it off. But his fear of the unknown was stronger than his need to know the truth. Once he had let his inner beast free, if he indeed had an inner beast, then there would be no putting it back in his cage, not if anyone in the house saw.

  All his uncle’s plans for him to take over the company would be crushed. She was right, he had to talk to his uncle; he owed him that much at least, after all the time and effort he had put into raising Kane.

  Dressing in his usual Armani suit, he looked at himself in the mirror as he adjusted his tie. The man staring back at him was different. It was in the way he moved, the way his brow furrowed.

  Stupid. It’s just your imagination. No one else will notice any difference in you. They will all see the heir to the Reinier Corporation. Nothing more.

  Or could he be more? So much more, but not here.

  Her face swam in his eyes; he still didn’t know her name. And yet he seemed to know her. There was a connection between them, and he flexed his hand, reliving the shock of electricity that had shot along his nerve endings each time she touched him.

  Cursing, he grabbed his keys and wallet, and made his way downstairs. Glancing at his watch, he knew he was too late for breakfast, but he didn’t think he could stomach food, not when his whole future hung over a precipice. He could grab some coffee at work, and send his PA out for food later if his appetite returned.

  “Kane,” Darius’s voice called out to him as he reached the hallway. “Are you feeling well?”

  Kane mentally put a smile on his face and prayed he would be able to fool Darius, the man who knew him better than anyone else in the world. The man who had raised him as his heir. The man who had given him the bracelet.